Being a parent is an exciting journey, with lots of magical times and challenges. There are some things that you could think about that will make a difference to you and your child.

• Your baby will love hearing your voice. Talk, read, sing to them, even when they are really small

• You cant spoil your baby with too much love and attention. Babies cry because they have wind, or they need to eat, sleep, be soothed or changed, not because they are demanding or spoilt.

• Some babies are more unsettled than others and may need you to experiment with ways that settle them - you could try taking them for a walk, rocking, soft music, gently patting their back or singing softly to them.

• Your role as a parent is to love, teach and guide your child through to adulthood. A big part of this is helping them to explore their world, experimenting with touching, tasting, listening and watching.

• This will mean babies will try to climb things, poke their fingers where they can, taste anything that they come across, put their hands in their food and generally explore. This is good!

• You can manage all this exploring by making sure small things that your baby can choke on are put away, putting precious things up high and making sure hot things can’t be pulled off a table or stove.

• Rest when you can. This might mean you have to ask people not to visit for a while if you are getting really tired.

• Your friends and family will want to help. Ask them to take baby for a walk so you can get a bit of sleep,or they can help by making meals or hanging out the washing. They’ll all want to hold the baby - but make sure they don’t interrupt the routines you’re trying to set.

• Being a new parent means you will be learning lots of new things. Ask for help if you need it. There are people who can help - for example Plunket, your GP, other parents.

December 2007 Newsletter 6

newsletter_6_web.pdf

June 2007 Newsletter 5

newsletterjun07_web.pdf

June 2006
 newsletterissue3.pdf

December 2006
newsletter_4_web.pdf

Of all the disturbing reports on the treatment of Nia Glassie, perhaps the hardest to believe is that this wee girl sustained abuse, over weeks- perhaps months. People must have seen. Someone should have contacted the authorities. This level of abuse has to be a community issue and the only way we can attack our appalling child abuse statistics is by dealing with it as such. We can no longer afford to stand by and witness the breakdown of our family structure. Every child in New Zealand is precious; they are our future and should be given every opportunity to reach their full potential. We need to do more at a policy level than shake our heads in disgust and wait for the next horrific incident.

We must identify, right from the outset, those children most at risk and target resources to their parents and caregivers. Our expensive public education system includes no compulsory content or training on child development, on the critical importance of the first three years of life. Undeniably, all New Zealand communities would benefit from better parenting support and assistance but inevitably some more than others: those historically disadvantaged, often from the bottom of the socio-economic spectrum, young parents from a deprived background who have received little care and affection, who have little education, with early childhood experiences of domestic violence, abuse, alcohol and drug dependency, poor parenting and educational disadvantage. These high-risk parents are identifiable from early pregnancy.

There are community organisations out there to provide the necessary help and assistance. But are they getting to those most in need before it’s too late? Nia’s situation again highlights urgent need for discussion around Cindy Kiro’s comprehensive tracking plan, or Graeme MacCormick’s idea for a universal welfare and needs assessment for every child at birth.

If Nia survives this appalling abuse; even if she doesn’t have clinical brain damage, how much damage would her developing brain have received during the prolonged abuse that will have changed her life forever? New Zealand’s inexcusable youth crime statistics are populated with young offenders whose young lives are scattered with incidents of chronic maltreatment, parent inflicted injury, complete failure of attachment –all culminating in damaged impulse control. If Nia survives this, will she be at high risk of joining the ranks of feared young offenders?

It is imperative that every New Zealander involved with young children knows the critical ‘brain building’ importance of the first three years of life, and how to help give children the best start. This is what will shape our society.

Written by Kim van Duiven, Executive Director  and Judy Bailey, Deputy Chair, Trustee